Rainbow Baby

Since some mothers have started writing this, I thought I join the bandwagon as well.  Mine is probably a bit boring compared to others.  However, my schedule is currently not fix as baby has her own schedule and is all up-side-down for now. 6am - Wake up to pump.  If baby is awake, will direct latch her first, then pump.  Because usually, my supply during this time is the fullest and baby won't be able to finish.  If baby is still asleep, would do power pump for 1 hour.  The yield I get is about 6-7oz. 7am - Get ready for work.  Pour the milk into the bottles and store in fridge.  Pack my pump and parts and icebag and storage bottles into my work backpack.  Shower.  Bring baby down and hand it over to my mom for her morning bath.  Eat breakfast while she is in the bath tub with my mom. Some days, she will be sleeping until 8am.  I would wake her up so that I can kiss her good bye and let her see me leaving for wor...

Being a mother has totally changed my thinking.  I am not sure if it's the new responsibility or the hormones, but internally, I feel I have changed, a lot. Whenever I go out for shopping, I would think of what I should buy for baby. Now that my birthday is approaching, I can't help but to think how to organise baby's first birthday, which is like 6 months down the road. And for my birthday present, I am thinking now. Should I get the Haakaa Silicone Breast Pump that everyone raves about?  I heard it is super convenient.  But I don't know how long more my breastfeeding journey would last.  So, is it worth it?  If I use for another 6 months (let say I aim for 1 year breastfeeding)?   Or should I get a new backpack to put my breast pumps to work?  Then again, it's only for another 6 months?? When I try to think of something that I can use for myself entirely, I can't.  All I can think is how can it benefit baby.   S...

When I was pregnant, I was very interested to use cloth diaper.  I was into this pro-nature thingy, about saving Mother Earth and being environmental friendly.   But in the end, I couldn't do it.  I am a little sad because I wanted so much to let baby wear natural clothing, but we are now with disposable diapers. We tried for a while.  It didn't work mainly because of laundry issues and my parents are babysitter and they are not comfortable with cloth diaper and I can't force it on them. Their reasons are a plenty.  Bulky lah, hot lah, difficult to wash lah, difficult to dry lah, don't know how to snap lah, don't know how to put it on lah, baby poo too many times lah etc.  Disposable is so easy.  Just put on and throw. So, I tried using only on weekends when I am around.  I love it.  Baby also looked very nice in cloth diaper.  But when she soiled, it was a headache.  You know breastfeed baby's poop can be very mess...

This morning has been a very unusual day.  When I opened my Facebook, I read about a mother who complained about her husband addicted to games on his mobile phone, so much so that he not only neglected his wife and child, he neglected his responsibilities as a husband, father and caretaker.  She was cursing the game developer. The weird part was, this is not an unusual phenomenon.  So many other women commented that they are going through the same experience. I hardly talk about this as I don't like to put down my family for the sake of publicity. But I have to say this that I am also going through this.  It gets better now but it's still there.  And I feel this is such a huge negativity that people have to start understanding that game addiction is as bad as drug addiction.  Once you stopped, you will get withdrawal symptoms.  I am serious. My husband is hooked on the app game, Hay Day.  It's an old game and I played it for a bit...

I was adamant to start solid food only when she reaches 6 months old, as recommended by the paed and also in some mommy group.  My sister was pestering me to start when she was 4 months old because that's when my nephew started.  I said no, stubbornly.  Insist to start only at 6 months. Then I read in Kelly's Mom about solid food, to look for signs if she is ready.   Signs that indicate baby is developmentally ready for solids include: Baby can sit up well  without  support. Baby has lost the tongue-thrust reflex and does not automatically push solids out of his mouth with his tongue. Baby is ready and willing to chew. Baby is developing a “pincer” grasp, where he picks up food or other objects between thumb and forefinger. Using the fingers and scraping the food into the palm of the hand (palmar grasp) does not substitute for pincer grasp development. Baby is eager to participate in mealtime and may try to grab food and put it in his mouth....

This happened couple of weeks ago.  Remember I posted about a recurring milk blister on my right (.)(.)?  I have finally got rid of it on my own.  But I don't recommend it. This is one of the breastfeeding horrors.  So, as usual, I tried to pick it using finger nails while in the shower.  After a few times, that stubborn blister still there.  So, I did it one more time, this time with force and I felt skin came out.  Delighted, I looked at my nips and found that it is bleeding.  OK, I thought to myself, perhaps now it is out. I compressed my right boob to see if the duct is cleared.  Instead of milk squirting out, it was blood.  I thought to myself again, ok, so this is how pink milk came about. I finished shower and dried myself.  My nips continue to bleed.  I thought to myself, oh, this is unusual.  Usually, it's just a single drop of blood.  Not this much.  I used a tissue to press on it to stop t...

Disclaimer:  Since these are sensitive topics, I will have to write a disclaimer that these are entirely my own opinion.  Everyone's journey is different.   I feel sometimes we, women can be very judgmental and argumentative.  Sometimes it can be good, sometimes not.   Yesterday, a heated debate on breast milk vs formula milk was on TBAN.  Today, a debate on home water birth vs hospital birth was on.  And not to mention the ongoing debate on to vaccinate vs not to vaccinate.  All mothers, all about their own child, all about their own experiences. I can't vouch for anyone or say who is right or wrong.  Everyone has freedom of speech.  Everyone has their own opinion.  And mind you, every woman now is educated enough to read and write.  And getting on the internet is as easy as ABC.  So, if you want any info, just Google.  So, everyone is knowledgeable.  It's just what they choose to follow.   ...

I am lactose intolerant.  For a long time, I didn't know why I was having diarrhea after drinking certain milk until when I was in secondary school and found the reason was lactose intolerant. I was so proud of it when I was in school because this word sounded so bombastic and I kept on bragging to my friends that I have this condition called lactose intolerant.  And I like the look on their face as they have no idea what it was and it sounded like something very serious. Anyway, I am not proud of it at all.  I love milk.  But I can't drink some kinds of milk.  If I did, I will have a bad case of diarrhea that looks like from food poisoning.  I avoid Nestle brand like crazy, especially milk powder from Nestle.  One time, I bought Nestle milk powder.  I think it was Nespray.  Can't remember which type, but definitely Nestle.  And I don't remember why I bought it in the first place as I don't drink milk powder.  I think someo...

Just when I thought things has gotten in place and system is working well, baby has started with a new thing yesterday night and now makes me scratch my head to think. Although she has not started crawling, but if you put her on the bed on the stomach, she would push her legs to move forward.  And her head would be on the bed as she pushes, so her head like glides on the bed. I have already put bolsters and pillows around the bed.  We co-sleep since she was born.  But after yesterday's night episode, it makes me think now how to keep her safe and not fall.  No incident yet, but better safe than sorry. Our bed is a queen size bed.  Because it's so small (compared to king size), husband have to sleep on the floor.  On the bed is baby with me, 2 pillows upright for me to lean against, 1 pillow flat for me to sleep, maternity pillow (detachable) as safety rail on the right and a small pillow as safety rail on the left.  Both baby and I share a...

This is kinda a taboo subject for me but since I am anonymous here, I feel it's ok to talk about it.  My colleagues were teasing me as I told them I have not had sex since I got the BFP until now.  That's like more than a year.  They asked if my husband is ok about it and yes, he is. You see, he is not the type who is crazy about sex.  When I was pregnant and my hormones were raging, I asked if he wants to do it but he refused as he was worried that we might hurt the baby in the womb.   After birth, we had talked about starting it all over again.  But I have a phobia now since delivery.  So much so that I don't want anything or anyone touch me down there.  Even when the gynae did a pap smear, my legs were automatically shaking and I couldn't control them. I am not sure if the whole birth thing kinda traumatized me.  The midwife did many cervical checks for dilation and that was one painful process where she stuck her fingers insi...