Clumsy

Last night, I fell.  Bump didn't hit the floor.  I basically did a split.  Right leg was straight out and left leg on my knees.  It was a very good stretch.  I didn't like fell on the ground but I did a very good split and stretch.

What I did was I stepped on some water and it's not like a lot of water.  You see, I have sweaty feet and sweaty feet and wet floor is very dangerous.  So that's what happened.

And then on top of that, my ankles were badly swollen.  Yes, I lost control of my legs now.  I can't estimate.  I can't even see my feet.  And yesterday, I totally cannot control how I walk.  

I am super clumsy and bump into things and knock onto walls and things I cannot imagine of.  I guess my ligaments are really loose now.  I have to be extra careful.

After that stretching accident, I felt a little cramp and a little sharp pain below.  I am not sure what it is.  There's no blood though.  I told my colleagues, if I don't dilate, that stretch will probably force it to.  Will know during my checkup.

Oh well.  

I told bump to come out when she is due and not earlier.  That's because I want her to be as healthy as possible with no health complications.  I don't want her to stay in NICU.  The longer the baby stays in the womb, the better it is for the baby.  I read somewhere that IQ is higher too, not sure how true.

My nephew was born when he was due.  He is smart and well-behaved (besides being naughty once in a while).  I have heard preemies are difficult to look after.  My colleague have preemies.  They are more hyper active and some have eyesight problem.  So the more reason I want her to stay put.  I know many moms who have preemies (it's quite a huge number now).  They struggled but made it.  I am not saying preemies are bad.  It's the way we are bringing him/her up that determines that.  But full-term babies are easier to look after.  That's my take.

Anyway, I am glad she passed 37 weeks, that means no need NICU, which is super costly by the way.  But now every day, I get worried.  Is she moving?  Is she active?  Is she ok?  What is this itchy thing on my ankles?  Is it a sign of preeclampsia?  Is it cholestasis?  Is it dangerous?  

Now I can't wait to pop.  That's because I can't stop worrying.  And besides becoming a hazard myself, I just want everything to be ok and safe.

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